i don't have much to post about anymore since i've been feeling so well.
i rarely get sick anymore, and if i do its due to my period, over-eating, or just random unknown causes. but it really is rare that this happens. i am unbelievably thankful for this. i've really started to go on my spiritual path in life and have become very enlightened and i am really happy with where i am in life.

for any of you who have questions or wish to know more please feel feel to contact me at

dancer4life129@zoominternet.net

my email hasn't let me be able to reply to messages but i'm going to be getting it fixed rather soon and ill get to all of your messages asap.

hang in there everyone. xxx

i can't believe i haven;t even posted in the new year. apparently its been pretty good since i've had nothing major to post about, well until now. i have been completely miserable sick for the past 2 and a half weeks and i cannot get rid of it. started with a fluke in getting my period out of my continuous pack, which made my stomach completely out of whack. and then within a week and i half i think i got a stomach virus on top of it because i had an unbelievably headache and fever which brought me to the hospital. they just put some liquids in me for dehydration and sent me on my way. so here i am. haven't been able to barley eat on meal in the past 2 and a half weeks without throwing out, i haven't eaten solids in three days, and i had to take a medical leave form school because i was missing so much. i'm completely miserable. i haven't felt this bad in months. it needs to go away soon so i can have my damn life back, because its gone at this point. i can't do anything but lay around and drink gatorade. coming up on three weeks is going to be so rough. 

i have not felt this shitty in ages, and its only because i got my period. i know you probably love hearing these details of my life but i am thrilled to say that this is the only time i get this severely sick. i truly rejoice in the thought of this, knowing where i once was and how far i have come from that deep dark place. i've let go of a lot in my life and i'm learning to live again. i cannot say that i have ever been this truly happy in my life. everything seems to be going to well and i'm not sad. sad like i once was. i finally have friends, true friends, true best friends who i would do absolutely anything for and i already know will be my best friends for the rest of my life. friends whom i am missing so much since we've been on break and had to go home. i'm living my life for myself, not for a boyfriend and not to please my parents, for myself. a huge vent, i know, but i need it. i love to actually see my life and happiness written out. i think this is also why my stomach doesn't hurt... i'm happy again. i'm too happy to care.

i wanted to share with you all my very first tattoo with i got about a week and a half ago. i got the phrase "this too shall pass". i got it because of my diagnosis with GP. whenever i was having one of those awful moments where i was just stuck in sickness and so down, and sad, my mom would always say this to me. apparently her mother said it to her whenever she was going through a hard time as well. it just means that everything will get better, the bad will go away, and things will be better once again. its such a beautiful and special quote to me that i had to get it as the perfect first tattoo. its perfect for GP suffers because its so true with the waves of sickness we all go through and over the improvement that i alone have seen over the past 3 years of having the disease. i hope you all like the tatt!

hello everyone. i haven;t posted in so long because i guess there really isn't a need to. i've being doing so well i cant believe it. i rarely get sick anymore and when i do it only lasts two or three days. its really a miracle. i think college actually has helped. i love it so much and i'm so happy there. it seems like honestly when i go home i get sick. i dont know if its something in my house that is actually causing it though or if something there triggers stress or something bizarre like that but i dont understand it. i just got home on last wednesday for thanksgiving break and i'm here until sunday. i'm very excited for thanksgiving and i hope you all have an amazing holiday.

guess what! its that wonderful time of the month, well for me every 4 months. thank the lord that i was put on continuous birth control to eliminate some of my periods cause man, they are AWFUL. i woke up with paralyzing stomach nausea, missed my two classes, and slept till one. i barely left my dorm, let alone my room. back and fourth with nausea, waves of cramps, and massive pain in my ovary area really just makes the day so wonderful. in addition to my normal meds, i've taken some ibuprofen to ease the pain and basically laid down all day. i hardly ate. and threw up only once. my only secret to getting through periods with GP is to all out eliminate them. i couldn't handle month after month because the intense ill-ness would only be over just in time for a new period to begin. but people always enjoy tell me "i heard thats so bad for you" "you are not going to be able to have kids" this will hurt you in the long run." well actually no its not. my gynecologist, whom i adore and trust with my entire life, told me that there is no need to worry and that nothing bad can happen from increasing the time between periods. so i don't worry one bit. so off to more time in bed i go. waking up and taking a history exam tomorrow morning won't help my stomach, but hopefully i can get through the rest of the day.

i have been having the WORST allergies since thursday this week. well at least i think it's allergies. i'm pretty sure they are, and they are miserable. my entire head is full of crap and its running down my throat and evidently into my stomach making my decent stomach hurt like hell. i slept until 2 today and literally sat around wallowing in self pity over my body feeling like complete crap. and driving back to school for the wonderful hour and a half drive in the pouring rain and dark just added to the day. i'm going to go to the health center tomorrow after my classes to see if they have something to give me to stop this madness!